[ It's strange to see the past leave for the present, but what strikes Red more are Komaeda's words than the re-emergence of the form he knows. He hears Charizard's huff of air in his acknowledge of Komaeda, and then feels him as his head comes to rub at his cheek, catching Red off and his hands coming to find that angular face.
It's warm. It's always there, despite how much he can never let these scars go. He can't help but be apologetic to the pokémon, more deserved to be a mess than he, but more thankful for his ever presence, pressing their faces in with eyes closed. The emotional effects around him ebb away, a light humidity persisting, but Charizard there to keep them warm. ]
... Thank you. [ His eyes meet with Komaeda with those two words, face still pressed close to his partner. ] All I wanted... was for you to not see me as weak. You could've walked away... I would have accepted it. [ The gaze drops, his mouth tightening with his brow. ]
Emizel... we got into an argument. He threw electricity at me by accident in anger, and the anger set me off. He had every right to be angry at me, but when we talked later and he said he thought I meant it... he thought that was me.
[ It hurts. His voice deepens, some attempt to stop it from cracking. ] I was selfish. Our argument was about some guy and he just cared about whose side I was taking! I wouldn't do that to anyone! I wouldn't! That isn't me!
[ But it cracks regardless, it turns hollow, as the pain spills out along with the haze of his sight and the wet air. He breathes in a breath that would be sharp, but instead it bubbles in his throat, and Red leans back into Charizard, the pokémon's neck curling to allow his head to rest under his chin. ]
I told him I got attacked that day. He told me he got attacked too. [ Fingers press into scaly skin. He sees the line he won't be able to backtrack if he crosses it, but his defences are already down. It only takes a pause for him to continue. ] But I lied... I died. I got blinded by my anger and Charizard paid the price for it as well.
[ He wipes his face roughly with a hand, not bothering to hide from Komaeda when he looks back at him. Blotchy and wet, his upset make his muscles tense. ]
But that isn't true either. I snapped out of it before we were killed. We... before we died, I stopped. I was thinking...
'I don't want to kill anyone.'
[ There's a smile that grows on his face with those words, and his shoulders shudder once with a laugh in his throat, before his head bows to the horns below. He'll have more to say, even if Komaeda decides to be silent. There was still plenty to say, to explain and return to, a mess of points strewn around by emotion. ]
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It's warm. It's always there, despite how much he can never let these scars go. He can't help but be apologetic to the pokémon, more deserved to be a mess than he, but more thankful for his ever presence, pressing their faces in with eyes closed. The emotional effects around him ebb away, a light humidity persisting, but Charizard there to keep them warm. ]
... Thank you. [ His eyes meet with Komaeda with those two words, face still pressed close to his partner. ] All I wanted... was for you to not see me as weak. You could've walked away... I would have accepted it. [ The gaze drops, his mouth tightening with his brow. ]
Emizel... we got into an argument. He threw electricity at me by accident in anger, and the anger set me off. He had every right to be angry at me, but when we talked later and he said he thought I meant it... he thought that was me.
[ It hurts. His voice deepens, some attempt to stop it from cracking. ] I was selfish. Our argument was about some guy and he just cared about whose side I was taking! I wouldn't do that to anyone! I wouldn't! That isn't me!
[ But it cracks regardless, it turns hollow, as the pain spills out along with the haze of his sight and the wet air. He breathes in a breath that would be sharp, but instead it bubbles in his throat, and Red leans back into Charizard, the pokémon's neck curling to allow his head to rest under his chin. ]
I told him I got attacked that day. He told me he got attacked too. [ Fingers press into scaly skin. He sees the line he won't be able to backtrack if he crosses it, but his defences are already down. It only takes a pause for him to continue. ] But I lied... I died. I got blinded by my anger and Charizard paid the price for it as well.
[ He wipes his face roughly with a hand, not bothering to hide from Komaeda when he looks back at him. Blotchy and wet, his upset make his muscles tense. ]
But that isn't true either. I snapped out of it before we were killed. We... before we died, I stopped. I was thinking...
'I don't want to kill anyone.'
[ There's a smile that grows on his face with those words, and his shoulders shudder once with a laugh in his throat, before his head bows to the horns below. He'll have more to say, even if Komaeda decides to be silent. There was still plenty to say, to explain and return to, a mess of points strewn around by emotion. ]