Komaeda Nagito (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
eyeswideopen) wrote2015-10-14 07:21 pm
eyeswideopen) wrote2015-10-14 07:21 pmEntry tags:
Messenger Box
If you need to get a hold of Komaeda, here's where you do it.
Messenger birds, action, what have you.
eyeswideopen) wrote2015-10-14 07:21 pm
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[But there's something off about Nagito, about his energy, and... Well, it can wait until they're sitting down and eating. No need to spring twenty questions on him right away.]
Where are you headed for lunch?
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He flips it to out to lunch.]
How have you been? I mean, since...then.
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You caught me at my low point. If anything, I've been more worried about everyone else I saw that night.
[...He looks at Nagito for a little while longer before adding-]
Including you now. Did something happen?
[Was it Junko-]
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While I did encounter Junko, that...isn't why I'm so tired. [Or thoughtful. It's difficult not to think back to how close he'd come to falling back.
Nagito takes a bite of the cookie, pausing to savor the taste with a happy little sound. Not too sweet. Just right.] This is incredible! Mm, just what I needed.
[He thinks to stall but, this is Silver. Silver's feelings trump his need to hide things.] I ran into Hinata again and we argued. ...but it was more than that.
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But Silver shakes his head.]
Enjoy it. Enjoy it, then tell me what happened.
[Because a cookie this massive is meant to be enjoyed and possibly also regretted, and he'd much rather see Nagito have a minute to enjoy himself and eat his food before going right into the heavy stuff.
...
He might want to enjoy his cookie as well.]
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But soon enough he's so full he could pop with cookie and so is Silver. He leans back on his hands and sighs.]
It wasn't terrible at first. Until I heard him speaking so...fondly of the girl from his memories. Our classmate, Nanami Chiaki. Something about that didn't sit right. I still don't know why! I did try to leave but he didn't want me to until he knew what was wrong.
He kept pushing, I kept trying to leave and oor memories resonated, dragging up something terrible. What he used to be.
[He presses a hand to his forehead to stave off a headache.] I couldn't leave him like that. I wanted to! It would have been the perfect change...but I couldn't do that.
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Do you really think that would have been the perfect change?
[There's no point in tact and sublety, is there? It's better to just say exactly what he thinks.]
You showed him some sympathy and stuck around. That's not a bad thing to do at all.
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Ahahah but, his memories kept showing...and I saw what everyone thinks of me back home. People talk after you're dead...or think you are. [It had hurt. That last nail when he stood on the edge.] It's nothing I didn't expect! I knew all they were saying but...
He wants me to go back to all of that. [For a second, dark shadows pour out around him, forming chains to clamp on his wrists and throat. He doesn't seem to notice.] He didn't understand...Why it hurts to think about. The person I have become... would do it to fix things.
[At the cost of his happiness and everything inbetween.] I think I broke after that. I just remember the world turning gray and not caring anymore. Before he did something I never expected.
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But there's more to be said, so he stops and listens. ...Takes another bite out of his cookie, just because.]
What did he do?
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He was warm. His words were all hypocritical but he wants to keep our memories here and give me a second chance. [That doesn't explain why his chest ached in the first place. But things had been so heavy he knows better than to figure that one out.] For everyone to give me a second chance. He should know better! We once were all murdering servants of Junko Enoshima, but humans like to blame others when everyone is equally guilty.
Not that they don't have good reasons for it! ...but, I still don't know what to do about him. He's so confusing and frustrating! He's changed and I'm only getting the full scope of it in pieces.
I can't stop thinking about that moment. No matter what I do and I can't understand that either.
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He sounds like an idiot.
[Let's get that out of the way, first and foremost.]
But he sounds like an idiot that cares about you. Or wants to care about you.
[And that's not necessarily a bad thing.]
...Would it be easier for you to try to be his friend? Is that something you'd want?
[How does that feel to him? He needs an idea of his reaction, at least.]
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I'm not sure we could be friends. I keep telling him that we can't just start over. It's pretty impossible to do that when he keeps grinding what I did in my face. Not that I don't deserve it.
[Yes, Hinata is a moron. He can totally agree.] Could we move on from this point? I...maybe. I just don't know.
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[It sounds a hell of a lot less frustrating than the emotional tug of war they're playing right now.]
He might need a reminder to stop grinding the past in your face like a total jerk, but maybe you can work something out.
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He keeps the past with him so he won't forget what everyone gave their lives for. [Which...actually sounds really like a tragedy in the making. He keeps thinking Hinata is the most vulnerable to Junko. He pauses.]
...but you're right. The past is the past. Hanging on to it, does little good. You can remember and move on. Mmm, but all this happened very recently for him. If I started shoving what he did in his face, he'd react just as bad. So maybe I need to make that clear.
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How'd you feel about this girl, anyway? Didn't you want to get someone out?
[Was his luck wrong?]
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Nanami Chiaki...she was very kind. Very gentle. Ah, I didn't mind being around her at all. In hindsight it makes sense she was the traitor. The rest of us have something...off about us. She never did. Even during the worst of it all she was very calm and collected.