[Naegi hesitantly reaches out to grab the cup of tea that Komaeda sets in front of him. The warmth that seeps through to his fingers is comforting, though, and Naegi is grateful for it right now.]
I wish I had known it would be like this... I mean, it's not like I planned on running into her, or to end up talking to her about anything, but... I should've run away, the moment I saw her. Leaving before I did would've been difficult, but I should've tried anyway.
[His grip around the mug tightens ever so slightly. Naegi has really been a fool today.]
...That's a really good description of what she does, though. If Enoshima-san hadn't dug up so many things, I probably would've just... bottled things up and not brought it up for a long time...
[He still kind of wants to, honestly. Just wants to go on and keep pretending to be fine, even when he's probably not.
...But he shouldn't, really. He can't, actually - not when Komaeda's been this kind to him and tried to get him to talk.]
That is a dangerous road. It does no good to hold things in, Naegi-kun. [Komaeda picks up his mug and holds it between his hands. How often had Naegi held it in, he wonders. He rises to his feet and gestures for him to follow.] Come with me, I want to show you something.
[He turns and heads for the staircase. The upper floors contain his work room and the gym. It had been an understanding that the bedroom not move. Komaeda ascends the stairs and pushes open the first door on the left. Inside the floor is wood panels and the walls painted with forest scenes. At the front of the room a bowl of water rests beside a bag of stones.] This is my teaching room. I guide students here to release their emotions and take control of them.
As we talk, I can teach you the first steps. It's quite simple! You will hold the bowl of water in your lap. However it is effected will show us a glimpse of how the flow of your life affects the world around you.
[Naegi is surprised at moving again, but he does as he's been asked and follows after Komaeda through the house. Curiosity overtakes him as they enter the room, and he finds his eyes lingering on the tress painted onto the walls.] It's... really nice in here...
[Carefully, Naegi listens to Komaeda's explanation. As he says, it seems simple, but...]
I... have to admit, I'm a little bit nervous. I kind of want to know what the water will show, but at the same time... I'm a little afraid of it.
[Because ever since he's woken up in that classroom, Naegi's life has felt like a complete and utter mess. He can't imagine that there's anything good that the water bowl will reveal.
But.]
...I trust you, though, Komaeda-san. [And being able to say that and mean it is such a relief for Naegi. Good job at failing, Enoshima.] If you think this will work, I'll try it.
[Naegi takes a seat on the ground. He almost sits seiza, then reconsiders and crosses his legs instead, setting the bowl down on his calves.
He gasps a little when the water twists a bit before smoothing out again.]
I always wonder if sand will be better. But water is...something everyone recognizes. [He sits across from Naegi with his hands on his thighs.]
We're constantly releasing emotional energy. Without our conscious will converting and releasing it as something harmless, it manifests in other ways!
As you well know.
[The stones are smooth as he picks up one and holds it over the bowl.] Back in Shaarnath, the instructors taught us to look for the patterns in our emotional energy. Look for that...and thank you for trusting me. I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Nanami.
...Tell me how you're feeling. Ah, and what effects you've seen manifest around you and for what.
Komaeda-san... Please don't apologize about Nanami-san. You were only respecting her wishes. I'm just... sorry for making you talk about something so painful...
[Naegi's eyes are downcast, but he isn't paying attention to the water very closely, so he doesn't notice how it momentarily twists into something like a knot before evening out. This is probably a good transition point, though.]
As for how I'm feeling... Sad and upset. [The water stirs again, just gentle ripples at first.] Guilty, I suppose, for making you talk about such difficult things. Longing and grief, for the friends I lost during the Mutual Killing Game. [As Naegi speaks, the water is no longer just simple ripples, but it swirls as if someone is stirring it with a spoon, getting stronger and more noticeable as Naegi continues to talk.] Also, this might sound odd, but... I feel relieved. [At this point, the water swiftly calms down.] Relieved that I'm talking with you and trust you. Relieved that Enoshima-san didn't break things as badly as I had feared.
In terms of emotional effects... There's still some things I don't recognize as easily, but I think I have a fairly good idea of which emotions cause what things. Happiness, hope, and trust... The air will shine bright around me if I feel any of them, and sometimes if my hope is very strong, plants will grow nearby. Fear, sadness, or despair seems to be the opposite, because the air will become dark and shadowed around me instead if I feel any of those. And then anger causes fire, like that time with Enoshima-san. I think there may be one other emotion that causes that, like intense panic, but I can't be completely sure.
I'm as relieved as you . [His eyes track the ripples in the water. After working with energy for nearly two years he knows what to look for and the water helps him see it. He moves closer and points to the still water. The stone is turned over and over in his fingers as he speaks low.] You first identify what manifestions are caused by.
The next step is to look at how the energy is projected from you. You are the source of the flame, the light, the growth, and death. Despite how they manifest that energy streams from your body in patterns. Watch the water.
[He waits for the count of two and let go of every restraint, every chain he imposes on himself. Naegi extended his trust, he would show him how deep the darkness goes. He grabs for the past and focuses on how it felt to be required to seek only despair. Chains rattle in the shadows, manifesting as his body becomes thinner, his hair wilder, and eyes dark with madness. Straight sharp lines cut across the water like swords.
He holds onto that boundless despair and turns it the other way. Gold light spills out like the first rays of the dawn, forming glimmering scales and bright dragons of light. The water swirls as it forms a cyclone that rises up out of the bowl. If his despair had been like a blade carving up targets, his hope is a hurricane. Slowly the light draws back as he puts the iron bars of control back into place. The water returns to the bowl. Komaeda drops his hands to the wood.] Focus on memories associated with the emotion you choose and watch how the water responds.
The more you practice the more you can consciously work that bit of energy and learn how it flows from you.
[Naegi's hands tighten on the bowl a bit when he sees that form again, but it's not in fear - it sets off an ache in him, something closer to sympathy. But the sadness turns into a quiet awe as he watches the golden dragon and twisting water.] Komaeda-san... [He breathes his senpai's name, amazed even after everything has settled.]
...I'll try it, though.
[He almost goes directly to a memory closesly associated with his grief, but Naegi is still nervous about what kind of result that's going to yield, so he opts to choose something he knows better first. Anger is an emotion he's learned to control a lot more since his arrival, so he decides to focus on a memory associated with it.
...Perhaps that's not the best choice.
Naegi thinks of seeing Enoshima for the first time when he arrived and how much she had riled him. It melds into what he'd experienced a short while ago with her, how raw it had felt to have her call into question everyone he's come to care about.
It's a mistake, probably, because Naegi doesn't take into account how much it's going to effect him - or how the water instantly begins to boil, rolling like a kettle left on just a little too long. Naegi gasps and jerks back, trying to calm down.]
10/9 action
Date: 2016-11-07 12:52 am (UTC)I wish I had known it would be like this... I mean, it's not like I planned on running into her, or to end up talking to her about anything, but... I should've run away, the moment I saw her. Leaving before I did would've been difficult, but I should've tried anyway.
[His grip around the mug tightens ever so slightly. Naegi has really been a fool today.]
...That's a really good description of what she does, though. If Enoshima-san hadn't dug up so many things, I probably would've just... bottled things up and not brought it up for a long time...
[He still kind of wants to, honestly. Just wants to go on and keep pretending to be fine, even when he's probably not.
...But he shouldn't, really. He can't, actually - not when Komaeda's been this kind to him and tried to get him to talk.]
10/9 action
Date: 2016-11-07 05:26 pm (UTC)[He turns and heads for the staircase. The upper floors contain his work room and the gym. It had been an understanding that the bedroom not move. Komaeda ascends the stairs and pushes open the first door on the left. Inside the floor is wood panels and the walls painted with forest scenes. At the front of the room a bowl of water rests beside a bag of stones.] This is my teaching room. I guide students here to release their emotions and take control of them.
As we talk, I can teach you the first steps. It's quite simple! You will hold the bowl of water in your lap. However it is effected will show us a glimpse of how the flow of your life affects the world around you.
Re: 10/9 action
Date: 2016-11-14 05:40 am (UTC)[Carefully, Naegi listens to Komaeda's explanation. As he says, it seems simple, but...]
I... have to admit, I'm a little bit nervous. I kind of want to know what the water will show, but at the same time... I'm a little afraid of it.
[Because ever since he's woken up in that classroom, Naegi's life has felt like a complete and utter mess. He can't imagine that there's anything good that the water bowl will reveal.
But.]
...I trust you, though, Komaeda-san. [And being able to say that and mean it is such a relief for Naegi.
Good job at failing, Enoshima.] If you think this will work, I'll try it.[Naegi takes a seat on the ground. He almost sits seiza, then reconsiders and crosses his legs instead, setting the bowl down on his calves.
He gasps a little when the water twists a bit before smoothing out again.]
10/9 action
Date: 2016-11-14 08:31 pm (UTC)We're constantly releasing emotional energy. Without our conscious will converting and releasing it as something harmless, it manifests in other ways!
As you well know.
[The stones are smooth as he picks up one and holds it over the bowl.] Back in Shaarnath, the instructors taught us to look for the patterns in our emotional energy. Look for that...and thank you for trusting me. I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Nanami.
...Tell me how you're feeling. Ah, and what effects you've seen manifest around you and for what.
10/9 action
Date: 2016-11-20 08:43 am (UTC)[Naegi's eyes are downcast, but he isn't paying attention to the water very closely, so he doesn't notice how it momentarily twists into something like a knot before evening out. This is probably a good transition point, though.]
As for how I'm feeling... Sad and upset. [The water stirs again, just gentle ripples at first.] Guilty, I suppose, for making you talk about such difficult things. Longing and grief, for the friends I lost during the Mutual Killing Game. [As Naegi speaks, the water is no longer just simple ripples, but it swirls as if someone is stirring it with a spoon, getting stronger and more noticeable as Naegi continues to talk.] Also, this might sound odd, but... I feel relieved. [At this point, the water swiftly calms down.] Relieved that I'm talking with you and trust you. Relieved that Enoshima-san didn't break things as badly as I had feared.
In terms of emotional effects... There's still some things I don't recognize as easily, but I think I have a fairly good idea of which emotions cause what things. Happiness, hope, and trust... The air will shine bright around me if I feel any of them, and sometimes if my hope is very strong, plants will grow nearby. Fear, sadness, or despair seems to be the opposite, because the air will become dark and shadowed around me instead if I feel any of those. And then anger causes fire, like that time with Enoshima-san. I think there may be one other emotion that causes that, like intense panic, but I can't be completely sure.
no subject
Date: 2016-11-21 05:47 pm (UTC)The next step is to look at how the energy is projected from you. You are the source of the flame, the light, the growth, and death. Despite how they manifest that energy streams from your body in patterns. Watch the water.
[He waits for the count of two and let go of every restraint, every chain he imposes on himself. Naegi extended his trust, he would show him how deep the darkness goes. He grabs for the past and focuses on how it felt to be required to seek only despair. Chains rattle in the shadows, manifesting as his body becomes thinner, his hair wilder, and eyes dark with madness. Straight sharp lines cut across the water like swords.
He holds onto that boundless despair and turns it the other way. Gold light spills out like the first rays of the dawn, forming glimmering scales and bright dragons of light. The water swirls as it forms a cyclone that rises up out of the bowl. If his despair had been like a blade carving up targets, his hope is a hurricane. Slowly the light draws back as he puts the iron bars of control back into place. The water returns to the bowl. Komaeda drops his hands to the wood.] Focus on memories associated with the emotion you choose and watch how the water responds.
The more you practice the more you can consciously work that bit of energy and learn how it flows from you.
no subject
Date: 2016-12-12 05:09 am (UTC)...I'll try it, though.
[He almost goes directly to a memory closesly associated with his grief, but Naegi is still nervous about what kind of result that's going to yield, so he opts to choose something he knows better first. Anger is an emotion he's learned to control a lot more since his arrival, so he decides to focus on a memory associated with it.
...Perhaps that's not the best choice.
Naegi thinks of seeing Enoshima for the first time when he arrived and how much she had riled him. It melds into what he'd experienced a short while ago with her, how raw it had felt to have her call into question everyone he's come to care about.
It's a mistake, probably, because Naegi doesn't take into account how much it's going to effect him - or how the water instantly begins to boil, rolling like a kettle left on just a little too long. Naegi gasps and jerks back, trying to calm down.]
S-sorry! I'm sorry, I didn't think...