Messenger Box

[eyeswideopen]

If you need to get a hold of Komaeda, here's where you do it.

Messenger birds, action, what have you.

Comments

[Action; 7/7]

[eyeswideopen]

[Defining your self worth through others is dangerous. Oh, yes he knows. And for the first time he's aware someone else has suffered in a similiar manner. No one has understood that like she can. But he still locks up when warm arms wrap around his neck.

For a second he doesn't know what to do. With Hinata it had been so simple. He invited touch, and touched him back. They'd only hugged once. Despite what he'd said to Silver, hugs were special. Only for those moments someone was really hurt. Only Sanae had hugged him every time she saw him.

He doesn't realize he's shaking until his mind catches up with events. Komaeda enfolds her in his arms, burying his face against her neck. He can feel every breath she takes and the thudding of a heart other than his.

If only he could believe he was worthy of anything.]

...Sonia, I feel so tired.

[Action; 7/7]

[properprincess]

[She sighs deeply when he hugs her back. It's very nice, reassuring to touch and be touched by someone she likes, even if it's a strictly platonic sort of touching. She lets it continue for a minute before finally pulling away and smoothing his hair from his face like her nanny used to when she was a little girl.]

It's been a long day. Go to bed and rest. If you want, I can stay here in the living room; you don't have to be alone tonight.

[Action; 7/7]

[eyeswideopen]

[He wants to take her up on her offer. The idea of falling asleep with someone around and knowing they'll be there when he wakes up...

He ducks his head and his smile is easy, seemingly light. They both know better than to believe that. It's the only way he knows how to cope sometimes. Most of the time.

But that's the problem. Living with Hinata. Loving him had dragged up wants for things he can't and shouldn't want. The idea that when he came home at night the lights could be on and the house warm. If he got hurt, someone being there.

Someone asking him about his day. Telling him they were glad he made it when he dragged himself home from a battle for the sake of the city. And being told he was loved...]

...no. No, it's alright. If I need anything I'll call you.

[He slowly climbs to his feet, and smiles one more time.] I'll get some sleep. Ha, I do have work in the morning!

[Action; 7/7]

[properprincess]

[She stands as well, worried about his mental and emotional state. She can't help the frown that rests on her face, but she hugs him again anyway, tightly.]

Please do. You know that I will come over as soon as you call.

[Finally, she lets go and manages a smile.]

Sleep well. I'll see you later.

[Action; 7/7]

[eyeswideopen]

[He can't help but lean into the hug and take every scrap of comfort from it he can get. It almost changes his mind. But he can't allow himself this much.]

Take care, I'll see you to the door.

[He doesn't speak as he leads her to his front door. As a good host he opens it and let's her out. The night air brushes against his face and he briefly considers a walk. It's a bad idea. His feet will take him to the place they shouldn't.

Hinata...loves him and yet.

He clenches his fingers into fists and watches Sonia go. Once he's sure she'll be fine, he turns away, heading back inside. Just as he reaches his doorway, his face falls. The light from inside shows it clearly. Tension has entered his spine and shoulders. He looks like a man backed into a corner, outnumbered and injured, resigned to his fate, but grimmly determined to stand his ground. His face is neutral, almost blank and empty. But his eyes are of a defeated man.

He shakes his head at himself and steps inside, shutting the door behind him. He had a duty to Peromei. He has to maintain himself, or he had no business being her representative. His hopes remain even if he feels like a thousand miles of bad road. As long as there's hope, he can make it through.

He always does.]