Messenger Box

[eyeswideopen]

If you need to get a hold of Komaeda, here's where you do it.

Messenger birds, action, what have you.

Comments

[Action; 7/7]

[properprincess]

Please don't sell yourself short. You deserve to be happy, as much as the rest of us do.

[She wouldn't object to Hinata being with both Nagito and Nanami if it makes them all happy. That is, after all, what she wants for all of her friends and classmates, what they all deserve: a second chance.]

Until he can make up his mind, you don't have to wait for him. And he should make up his mind. It's unfair of him to leave you in lingo. I will stand by your side no matter what outcome. That's what friends are supposed to do, yes?

[Action; 7/7]

[eyeswideopen]

That's exactly what friends do, Sonia. [He gently squeezes her hands. It had never occured to him that he could move on without Hinata. It had just seemed important to wait for him to make his decision. Even when they started being something else.

But there was no one else that appealed to his interests. Once, there might have been. Now, love just seems like one of those lies people believe in that never really work out. Not for people like him, anyway.]

...Even if I don't wait for him any longer, I really don't have a desire to be with anyone else.

[He can't quite hide the pain in his voice. By now there's really no point.]

Not for a very long time.

[It's in his eyes, 'if ever'. Happiness can be had without having a partner, can't it? He had been happy here before Hinata appeared. He'd...Komaeda shuts his eyes, his head bowed.]

This has caused me some...difficulties in serving Peromei and the people properly. I know I deserve to be happy. But haha, maybe.

[He looks back at up her with a self-depreicating smile on his face.]

Maybe relationships just aren't for me.

[Action; 7/7]

[properprincess]

[She gives him a gentle smile, not quite bright, but definitely one that shows she cares about him.]

Hm, it doesn't matter if you are with someone or not, does it? If you have a significant other, that doesn't keep you from being Komaeda Nagito. It doesn't make you any less my friend, or the representative to Peromei or your master's student. Defining our self-worth through other people is a dangerous game, though you and I have both been victim to it.

[She drops Nagito's hands and wraps her arms around his neck in a tight hug.]

No matter what happens, you are stronger than you are giving yourself credit for. Remember that you are worthy of everything you want. Ultimate Lucky Student or not.

[Action; 7/7]

[eyeswideopen]

[Defining your self worth through others is dangerous. Oh, yes he knows. And for the first time he's aware someone else has suffered in a similiar manner. No one has understood that like she can. But he still locks up when warm arms wrap around his neck.

For a second he doesn't know what to do. With Hinata it had been so simple. He invited touch, and touched him back. They'd only hugged once. Despite what he'd said to Silver, hugs were special. Only for those moments someone was really hurt. Only Sanae had hugged him every time she saw him.

He doesn't realize he's shaking until his mind catches up with events. Komaeda enfolds her in his arms, burying his face against her neck. He can feel every breath she takes and the thudding of a heart other than his.

If only he could believe he was worthy of anything.]

...Sonia, I feel so tired.

[Action; 7/7]

[properprincess]

[She sighs deeply when he hugs her back. It's very nice, reassuring to touch and be touched by someone she likes, even if it's a strictly platonic sort of touching. She lets it continue for a minute before finally pulling away and smoothing his hair from his face like her nanny used to when she was a little girl.]

It's been a long day. Go to bed and rest. If you want, I can stay here in the living room; you don't have to be alone tonight.

[Action; 7/7]

[eyeswideopen]

[He wants to take her up on her offer. The idea of falling asleep with someone around and knowing they'll be there when he wakes up...

He ducks his head and his smile is easy, seemingly light. They both know better than to believe that. It's the only way he knows how to cope sometimes. Most of the time.

But that's the problem. Living with Hinata. Loving him had dragged up wants for things he can't and shouldn't want. The idea that when he came home at night the lights could be on and the house warm. If he got hurt, someone being there.

Someone asking him about his day. Telling him they were glad he made it when he dragged himself home from a battle for the sake of the city. And being told he was loved...]

...no. No, it's alright. If I need anything I'll call you.

[He slowly climbs to his feet, and smiles one more time.] I'll get some sleep. Ha, I do have work in the morning!

[Action; 7/7]

[properprincess]

[She stands as well, worried about his mental and emotional state. She can't help the frown that rests on her face, but she hugs him again anyway, tightly.]

Please do. You know that I will come over as soon as you call.

[Finally, she lets go and manages a smile.]

Sleep well. I'll see you later.

[Action; 7/7]

[eyeswideopen]

[He can't help but lean into the hug and take every scrap of comfort from it he can get. It almost changes his mind. But he can't allow himself this much.]

Take care, I'll see you to the door.

[He doesn't speak as he leads her to his front door. As a good host he opens it and let's her out. The night air brushes against his face and he briefly considers a walk. It's a bad idea. His feet will take him to the place they shouldn't.

Hinata...loves him and yet.

He clenches his fingers into fists and watches Sonia go. Once he's sure she'll be fine, he turns away, heading back inside. Just as he reaches his doorway, his face falls. The light from inside shows it clearly. Tension has entered his spine and shoulders. He looks like a man backed into a corner, outnumbered and injured, resigned to his fate, but grimmly determined to stand his ground. His face is neutral, almost blank and empty. But his eyes are of a defeated man.

He shakes his head at himself and steps inside, shutting the door behind him. He had a duty to Peromei. He has to maintain himself, or he had no business being her representative. His hopes remain even if he feels like a thousand miles of bad road. As long as there's hope, he can make it through.

He always does.]